A man’s biggest problem is in fact his testosterone, and women who act and dress like “sluts” are perhaps his biggest weakness. So why do men seem to want “whores”? It is because they can provide you with guilt-free sex. You see, his testosterone gives him an infinite amount of sex drive, which he feels incredibly guilty about. Also, he is paranoid that the woman he respects and loves will judge him for his animalistic nature.
In fact, women are very prone to being overly proud, especially in this regard. To make matters worse, they often use their sexuality to manipulate what they know and understand to be man’s greatest weakness, namely desire. When women make themselves “look attractive”, it not only leads to pride but to a certain ‘flavor’ of pride called ‘moral superiority’. I mean, they love to manipulate a man’s vulnerable foibles and then turn around and say things like, “Aren’t men horrible? Men are dogs!” (We humans love to feel like our morality is superior to other people’s morality.) So why do men love such completely useless and fake things like high heels, makeup, “fake boobs”, navel and nose piercings, false eyelashes, false nails, and the like?
Paradoxically, it is because men feel so guilty about their animal nature (testosterone, desire) and as a result of this guilt that ‘colors’ and distorts their perception, they don’t know how to ‘read’ women. Men are quite blind. That is, they don’t know if a woman wants sex or not, or what ‘flavor’ or style of sex she wants, or when she wants it, how much, etc., and this whole area can be very confusing. Add to this the well-known facts that women often deliberately send “mixed signals” and tend to be generally incongruous and riddled with internal conflict. The human condition is equally complex, frustrating and very confusing on both sides. Most of these problems aren’t going to change anytime soon, so it’s best to simply accept these limitations as an integral part of the human condition.
Again, as men, we often can’t tell when (or if) our woman wants sex. So, false nails, hairpieces, lace panties, super short skirts, perfume, high heels, and dyed “bleached blonde” hair (or even a wig) send us a very clear signal of where to go. come on, “Okay. She obviously wants it.” So it’s not so much that we want “sluts” as it is that we want women who want and clearly enjoy sexuality. A “whore” is more like a “loose” or promiscuous woman, but deep down, men generally prefer a woman who dresses and behaves like the “whore”, but is not a real “whore”. For me, there can be “sleeping whores” as well as “conscious whores”, so to speak.
Women who are “asleep” (ie unaware and inconsiderate) are the ones who selfishly dress sexy to “get” things from men (eg attention, validation and especially manipulative power). They tend to exaggerate; they dress too much and appear to be sleazy. Regardless, men want sex through no fault of their own (she clearly does), but they don’t want to have relationships with such women because they find them unreliable.
On the other hand, a “conscious slut” is a conscientious, self-respecting type of woman who understands that men are innocently programmed to respond favorably to “fake things” like fingernails and eyelashes, and therefore gives her these gifts to her man. but not all men. She understands why her man loves false eyelashes, knee-highs, and miniskirts (once again, she relieves her unconscious guilt and worry), and she feels compassion for him. A couple aware in this sense is able to accept the animal nature of the other and laugh at the nonsense of human life together, without judging or condemning. It is better to work with nature than to resist, reject and have endless opinions about how things “should” be.
Compare this to the average “asleep” woman, for example, who “dresses up” when she goes out and then “dresses up” when she’s home with her man. This hurts her feelings for obvious reasons. It should be the other way around: dress nice when you go out, but dress incredibly sexy when you’re at home. I often recommend that women become more of a “conscious whore,” so to speak, that way they are communicating with her man: “I can be that dream girl, but for your eyes only.”
It’s not that we want whores, it’s that we want you to send us unequivocal “yes” signals when it comes to sex. “Fake breasts” and a little makeup and a navel piercing and some high heels are so effective and powerful because they remove all confusion, doubt and especially unconscious guilt. We see our woman wearing those things for us, and we’re like, “Okay, she definitely accepts my animal nature and she definitely wants sex.” She therefore tells the male brain that it is okay to continue.
A woman who dresses and acts like a “porn star” to us has a profoundly healing effect because she is subcommunicating, “I want it, I love it” and also saying, “I’ll have fun even if you’re not.” She’s a great performer” and more importantly, she says, “I love your masculinity and I love my femininity.”
Perhaps one of the worst experiences a man can have is discovering that the woman he just finished enjoying sex with didn’t really, truly, and consistently want it, or didn’t enjoy it for some reason. Even an experience like this is enough to traumatize us for life, because it hits us right at our most vulnerable weak spots, namely testosterone-based guilt and worry that we’ve hurt you because we’re physically superior to you.
Again, we guys are a bit “retarded” due to our testosterone and unconscious issues, so we just need you to send us clear signals that practically scream, “I want it!” We’re never entirely sure if our woman wants it” or not, and we don’t like to “make a move” on you unless we know for sure you’ll be receptive. Don’t expect a man to say, “Honey, I’d like you to dress like a whore” because we’re embarrassed that we even want this in the first place. We’re afraid you’ll judge and reject us, frankly, because we’re men.
Very often, we men want you to wear “fake things” and “prostitute clothes”, paradoxically because we are good men. It is not always because we are evil and narcissistic, but we need you to send clear signals because we are very considerate. We are often overly considerate, in the sense that we don’t want him to feel needed or used. Once again, we have this testosterone problem and the blame; we care about hurting you; this is the masculine condition that needs to be understood and accepted.
Testosterone is a powerful energy and as such is difficult to manage. With this energy, we can lift a car on our shoulders and throw it off a cliff if you want. We can build bridges, houses and roads for you, and we can also go to war and protect our country with this amazing energy. To protect our woman, we will gladly kill a thousand men with our bare hands if necessary. Yet at the same time, we often don’t know our own strength and can end up hurting the woman we love. This energy also gives us a sex drive that is completely unreasonable, illogical, and unreasonable, just as your female emotions tend to be.
Just as a woman can be truly happy if she can find a man who understands that her emotions are not personal or “serious”, a man can also be truly happy if he can find a woman who knows how to send him a clear “I want”. I love it” he says dressing up, acting and talking, and basically oozing sexuality. Unfortunately, men don’t understand women on an emotional and social level, just like women usually don’t understand men on a testosterone level. These are the ones who they explain most dating and relationship problems.
We men are afraid to have this kind of conversation with you because we don’t want you to judge us or go on a ‘higher moral’ ego trip about it. A woman is not ‘morally superior’ just because men are ‘turned on’ in fake hair wigs or push-up bras. The reason we love these things is because they let us know that you’re ready for sex. The last thing we want to do is hurt you, so we tend not to take too many risks. We are so used to feeling judged that we have developed a numbness. Our testosterone has made us all very foolish, so when it comes to sex, we’re embarrassed to tell you what we want. Usually we just repress this side of ourselves. The animal nature of man is a powerful force, and only a small percentage of men and women understand it, let alone truly master it and put it to work for the relationship instead of against the relationship.
On a similar note, the main reason we like women who appear to be less intelligent or act like Marylin Monroe is because criticism is often mistaken for intelligence. In reality, however, criticism and judgment do not indicate intelligence at all, quite the contrary. Thus, men are so used to dealing with women who have negative, critical, ‘morally superior’ attitudes, and we are so used to dealing with ‘victim mentalities’ and paranoid, highly defensive women who love to ‘feel hurt’ all time. the time when we’ve developed a kind of numbness where we don’t tell women what we want, what we like and what we think because “we just don’t want to go there”. We prefer not to hurt your feelings and embarrass ourselves. It’s easier to just “don’t go there” and secretly watch some porn instead.
It’s not that we want women of lesser intelligence, it’s just that we don’t want to be around women who are judgmental, defensive, paranoid, judgmental, ‘morally superior’ and the like. These types of women are often thought to be “intelligent,” but they are actually very negative, puritanical, cynical, and fastidious. They love to feel angry (and especially “hurt”), and we men often make the mistake of blaming ourselves for our woman’s shortcomings.
Marylin Monroe was incredibly attractive to men, not because she was inferior in intelligence, but because she was not opinionated. She was smiling all the time, she was cheerful and laughed at our silly jokes. She made us feel attractive and she eased our “man guilt” as she seemed to deeply accept our animal nature. So it’s not so much that we want an intellectually inferior woman to feel superior to her, but that we (men of integrity) want women who can playfully “play dumb” because that makes us feel trustworthy; a stubborn woman pretends not to trust us and not really love us. The intellect does not really serve our relationships. The mind is excellent at solving mathematical problems, but the Silent Mind, which is free of opinions, leads to true Love. I call this state, “Divine Stupidity” and it is an important key when it comes to ‘picking up’ as well as in dating and relationships. (Makes life extremely easy.)
Many blessings, Stephane Hemon